Knocking On My Head - March 27

It’s 2.45am now, and i’ve stopped writing on my assignments. Stumbled upon somebody’s notes on facebook. It gave me a moment of genuine chuckles, but in split seconds, bringing me back to my troubled reality.

By looking at the stats and data, i’ve tough time believing in, how much Malaysia has left behind South Korea and Taiwan, those who were at the same standard as us in 1960s. Probably even worse, crushed by our footballers.

Again, I’ve picked a tough module, knowing that I will complain when getting results, but still, I am studying what I’m interested, what I’m supposed to study. Economic and social development of countries. Better than spending RM 75 k to learn that one will be “guilty” if he/she gives low score to others in evaluation scheme. What the heck??? You need a degree to tell that??

Really being knocked hard on my head today. Somebody actually telling me she “hates” those who got scholarship. Of course, it surprises me when a bear actually talked his way to get scholarship. What happened to others? Are they mute or what? (just joking)

I need scholarship to complete my degree. But, not the degree I’ve wanted. It reminds me of what the McKinsey people said today. Do what it passions u. It always sound easy to the white barbarians. Do they know sometimes we don’t have a choice? Do they know we need to make sacrifices? Do what you are passionate at. bull shit la. What dream here dream there, if you want to dream, go America dream la.

Looking back at my assignment data. Malaysia’s GDP is only a bit higher than Samsung’s annual revenue. What the fuck? Really knocking my head now. Not because Malaysia performs badly. It’s because I’ve taken a fake econs degree and feeling helpless looking at it. But where else can i go?

PS: I saw someone’s name - Varaporn. What the heck? How does it feel to have the word “porn” in your name? Lau porn, porn Lau, Porn zheng, Zhou Porn.